Redefining the ‘Alpha Female’

In a man’s world, does a woman become more masculine to earn respect in society ?
Would it be more appropriate to act as though she has a lingam or become even more feminine in order to counter the imbalance ?

Lets begin with defining the term ‘Alpha‘. The word alpha is the first symbol for the greek alphabet and as a noun it means “something that is in the beginning, or something that is first; Original ”  ( according to the merriam- webster dictionary) . In astronomy,  it is used to designate the brightest star in a constellation . As an adjective, it is described as a powerful or assertive force in a pack.

It is also interesting that the use of the word ‘alpha’ saw a significant rise in its use (with masculine connotations) in about the 1930’s after the world war and the great depression.

Typically in today’s world the alpha female would often be described by the words ” strong, dominant, most attractive, bossy and authoritative”.  They are often affiliated with independent career success. And if more than one Alpha female exist in a room, it is usually predicted to lead in catfights, disaster and drama.

My most recent question is – ‘ why does it have to lead to catfights and drama ? ” . Probably because there are certain themes that we as the feminine collective are still working on within the masculine domination.

Lets look back at the definition of the word alpha. If alpha refers to that which is in the beginning or first – could the alpha female be the original type of woman?
before society defined what the value of a woman is ? (whether it is career, body type, social acceptability and the like? )

where would we find our value as women be if we weren’t defined as these parts of society ?

Personally how I would define a alpha female would be a woman
who is in her original state,
lives in a predominantly feminine way,
is intune with her cycles and that of nature,
sets trends by making evolutionary intelligent decisions,
a confident woman who ‘knows thy self’
and most importantly isn’t threatened/ jealous of other women around her because she realizes what makes her uniquely beautiful and worthy.

I came under this definition after many years of trying to come to terms with or transform the energy of ‘jealousy’. My resolution after trying to be everyone else’s cup of tea was to – become even more of who I knew I was (even more feminine).  To find what made me unique and turn up the tempo on it. Pretty much allow myself to be seen for who I really was.

so basically …

The alpha female is independent and unique. 
The reason why anyone ‘stands out’ from a crowd is because there is something ‘ different from the collective’  not because they are more/ less of a person.

She builds her life based on feminine values.
The values of a masculine culture include competitiveness, assertiveness, materialism, power-dominance and ambition.
Whereas a feminine culture places more value on the quality of life, quality of relationships, service and care for the weak.
This type of woman isn’t diminished by holding a feminine place in a relationship, but she also strives for equality within a partnership.

The alpha female emerges to counteract a masculine dominance .
A woman who is more feminine (or dominantly feminine)  is the greatest force against a patriarchal culture. Because it takes really living it – which is the truest and most challenging ministry.
Rather than just advocating for ‘screw the patriarchy’- are we being authentic in feminine values of co-operation rather than competition in our close relationships?
How is it that we can begin looking at no only other women, but other men as equally contributing roles to a healthy society? 

Equality is her goal.
Whether it is Gender equality, earning potential or even the energetic balance between feminine and masculine energy. (a balance between giving &receiving, doing &resting, living to work &working to live, Action &Creativity)

She does not play small to please others. 

The truth is that it can be as much of a gift to be beautiful and talented as we can be a target for the same attributes. And often times women can be downright mean to each other for it. And in the case where a woman is brought down by enough of her peers, it is often easier for her to just surrender, give up on developing her greatest art (herself) and play small.

This quote is one of my favourites by Marianne Williamson:
“We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others”

She sets the tone for the collective with her presence.
A feminine presence is often described as internal, curiously mysterious and has the effect of drawing you in. Whereas a masculine presence feels piercing, dominating, and external.

Since ancient times females have always been the more social, &  the evolutionary importance of women was often to keep harmony in place within a collective group.
It is interesting too that often in a group of women, one can easily point out the ‘leader’ by the group body language. Because often times, women naturally gravitate to mirror feminine qualities because of how we are inherently built.

Therefore an alpha- females best response to a masculine dominated world, is to be more feminine, more relational, more beautiful, more original….

what are your thoughts ?



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